Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Public Service Announcement

This is a PSA! This blog will be abandoned until this sickness I've encounter from the sicklings is gone.

Thank you! Come again!

Friday, February 4, 2011

Cancel, Cancel, Cancel!

I am bummed. I've had my certification test scheduled for a while now and with this crazy weather it was canceled this morning.

Side note: Did you know that canceled can be spelled correctly with two l's (cancelled)and with one? I'm a stickler for proper spelling and I had to google it to make sure. But now it's underlined with red like it's spelled incorrectly. I'm confused!

Along with my certification test being canceled, I had to cancel our reservation at the San Luis also. I had planned a relaxing night and dinner at the Steakhouse. The San Luis is an absolutely beautiful hotel! I loved having our beautiful wedding at the resort.

Maybe I should also write about what is going as far as baby making. I'm still waiting for my cycle to begin to start taking the medication. Remember earlier when I said that life always seemed to get in the way? Well, life has gotten in the way again. R's company announced that they are selling his plant. Who knows what will happen next but we are confident he has a job for a good year. We shall see. It's very stressing with me still in school and the shortages of teaching positions open. I have to keep telling myself: "Let go and let God".

Another road block is my weight. I'm not happy with it and don't want to get pregnant and have to be on bed rest or have any complications. So I'm currently dieting. I'll update when there's more to update! :)

There's a lot going on right now it seems like. It may just be me though. I stress over a lot and I feel like a lot of unknowns are being thrown my way.

Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day.  
~Author Unknown

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Happy 2 Years to Us!

Yesterday, January 31st, marked our two year anniversary! Really? It's been two years?! Wow! Time has flown by. Nobody knew but we trying then (in our wedding picture) to have a baby.

Trying has been extremely hard on myself. Every month when my cycle would disappear I would get a pregnancy test and it would always come back a BIG FAT NEGATIVE! I keep pregnancy tests stocked in our cabinet like people keep condiments in their refrigerator.

Our troubles go all the back to 2007. That's when we noticed something was not right. All the sudden my cycles disappeared. A month went by, then two and then three. I clearly remember my doctor's appointment was on February 14th, Valentine's Day.  When my appointment came, they whisked me right into the ultrasound room to see what was going on with my body. The ultrasound showed that my "woman" parts were messed up. My ovaries had cysts and weren't ovulating correctly and my uterus lining was thinning. Dr. Milner ordered blood work immediately. Like the amazing doctor he is, he clearly explained what was going on. He thought that my body was showing the beginning stages of pre-menopause. I was distraught. The room was spinning. I couldn't remember anything from the appointment just the word "pre-menopausal". I called my Mom crying and she had to the office to figure everything out. What a fabulous Valentine's celebration for us!

When the test results came in I remember R and I sitting on the couch in our apartment, holding hands. This one phone call was our whole future. Dr. Milner had said he would call good or bad. Thankfully it was good news! My levels were not those of a pre-menopausal woman! YAY! Before we ended the conversation he told me that if we ever wanted to have  children then we needed to get started within the next few years. You know the old saying, "My biological clock is ticking", well mine really was!

A lot of people don't understand and we get it, kind of. I mean they don't know how bad R and I both want children. They don't understand what we've gone through to get us to the point where we are now. To those people I will say this: It isn't about you. I hate, hate, hate when people say, "Oh, y'all are still so young", "What about a job?". GET ON WITH THE GET ON PEOPLE! First of all, I'm clearly not that young. I'm 26 and my body is just getting older. This has nothing to do with my health either. There is nothing that I can do to fix my body, trust me I've asked! Another thing, who ever said that I was going to school to get a job or a career? That's mine and R's decision! Right now that's the plan but I don't need anyone giving me advice about my life. People are so concerned with other people's lives.

That being said, is one of the reasons this blog is private for the time being. I don't need other people's opinions. I don't need the negativity. Another reason for this blog's privacy is because if it doesn't work the first time, I don't want all the "I'm sorry" or the "It'll happen when the time is right". Those aren't positive or encouraging. If it sucks then say "That sucks".

A new baby is like the beginning of all things-wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities.
Eda J. Le Shan